Crime | weird crimes 5 Craziest Crimes of the Week Including the arrest of 'affluenza' dad By Newser Editors Posted Aug 22, 2014 5:42 AM CDT Updated Aug 22, 2014 9:44 AM CDT Copied File photo of marijuana plants. (AP Photo/Ted S. Warren) A fitting name on the police blotter and an ill-advised call to 911 are among the weirdest crime stories of the week: Guess Why Paul Stoner Got Arrested: The jokes are only going to get worse for the Stoner clan of Virginia. Police arrested 42-year-old Paul Stoner on, yes, marijuana charges. Pretty serious ones, too. Guy Calls 911 When Denied Sex by Stripper: There are some incidents that don't warrant a 911 call. One of those is when a stripper won't turn a lap dance into sex, a lesson learned by a disappointed 53-year-old man in Montana. Dad of 'Affluenza' Teen Accused of Posing as a Cop: Another strange turn for the family behind the infamous "affluenza" defense. Dad Fred Couch has been charged with impersonating a police officer in Texas. He even reportedly flashed a badge at real officer. How Not to Get to a Meeting With Your Probation Officer: On the bright side, 18-year-old Michael Johnson of Albuquerque made it to a meeting with his probation officer on time. Unfortunately, he did so by zipping over in a stolen electric shopping cart, say police. To Get Jailed With Beau, Woman Stole $4 Wine: Cops: Move over, Romeo and Juliet: Texas brings us the tale of star-crossed lover Alicia Walicke, who apparently missed her jailed boyfriend terribly. Her solution to their separation, as per the cops who busted her? Steal a bottle of wine. Click to read about more crazy crimes, including an accused meth-maker turned in by her 7-year-old son. Read These Next New Fox star, 23, misses first day after car troubles. Iran's supreme leader makes first public comments since ceasefire. Her blood isn't compatible with anyone else's. Trump's spy chiefs back up his Iran claims, citing new intel. Report an error